Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
