I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
