Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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