And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
