Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
