her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
