You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
