the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
