I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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