I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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