They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
