You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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