My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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