Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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