no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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