does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Randomize
