so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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