Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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