didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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