Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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