Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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