i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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