I just cut my nipple shaving
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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