I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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