She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
