i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
