My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize