My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
