I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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