Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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