Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Even the bartender felt bad for me
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I just want to make out with him forever
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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