Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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