I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Jerry, you need to find god
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
