Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
