Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
