I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
