I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Randomize
