Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
A+ Viking dick
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
