you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
