If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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