great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
