dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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