he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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