I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
