how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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