I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
