anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
