Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
