I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
