it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize