your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize