i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize