i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
